ENGL 3110C Week 5 Memoir Review

ENGL 3110C Week 5 Memoir Review

Memoir Review

One moment I will never forget is when I found myself at my lowest point, lying outside on a cold, rainy 45-degree night at 2 AM in front of a greyhound station on 11 Railroad Ave in Salinas, California. I had just been dropped off by a taxi driver who tried to have me arrested because I didn’t have enough money to pay him. I was overwhelmed with heartache, a pounding headache, and filled with regret and thoughts of suicide as I replayed the situation over and over again in my mind.

ENGL 3110C Week 5 Memoir Review

Like the lyrics from Khalid’s popular song, I felt “young, dumb, and broke,” chasing after a love that turned out to be nothing more than a deceptive online persona, what this generation calls a “catfish.” I had nothing but a suitcase containing my life and a prepaid cellphone with only half of its battery left. I remember desperately calling and calling, only to have the phone go straight to voicemail. He had told me he loved me and promised to always be there for me, never hurting me. But here I was, hurt, alone, scared, and eight hours away from my nearest family members who wanted nothing to do with me due to a falling out caused by our differences. I was trapped in a predicament, shaped by my sheltered, toxic, and homophobic upbringing, while also trying to discover my true self.

ENGL 3110C Week 5 Memoir Review

Life felt unbearable, and I questioned its worth. As my grandmother would say, “I was smelling myself,” having an attitude that no one could touch me or have any influence over me. Growing up, I endured daily gay bashing from my parents, the very people who were supposed to make me feel safe. This led me to rebel and challenge authority at every turn. I cried, I prayed, and I begged God to rescue me from this situation, promising to turn my life around if only He would bail me out one last time.

ENGL 3110C Week 5 Memoir Review

The last bus for the night had already departed, leaving me with no choice but to wait until the station reopened at 6 AM the next morning. However, to my surprise, an unexpected delayed bus arrived an hour later, and little did I know that my prayers were about to be answered. I remember rushing over to the bus with my suitcase, drenched and falling apart, trailing behind me. When I reached the bus, I pleaded with the driver to take me closer to home, explaining that I didn’t have any money but could make arrangements to pay for the ticket by the time we reached the final destination. The gentleman shook his head and asked me to step aside.

Disheartened, I began to walk away when I heard a voice asking, “Where are you going, young man?” I turned around to see the bus driver, who had opened the luggage compartment and gestured for me to put my belongings in. Overwhelmed with gratitude, I cried and hugged him, repeatedly thanking him for his kindness.

ENGL 3110C Week 5 Memoir Review

Before allowing me on the bus, the driver pulled me aside and requested my ID. Although he believed I was a good kid and could be trusted, he decided to hold onto it until we reached our destination as a precautionary measure. Finding a seat on the bus, I plugged my phone into one of the charging cords and tried to warm up by wrapping my arms around myself, covered in a sweater and jacket. To my surprise, the bus driver approached me and handed me two blankets, saying,

“Stay warm, kid. It’s going to be a long ride, and I don’t want you getting sick on me.” I sat there in awe, realizing that even at my lowest point, God had heard my cries and provided a way out for me. Despite running away from home with no money, He had protected me, and all I could do.

References:

Boer, O. E., Tranent, P. J. (2013). Conceptualizing the relationship between maternal parenting style and adolescent self-esteem: A pragmatic approach. Journal of Relationships Research, 4, 1–7. https://doi.org/10.1017/jrr.2013.5  Carpio de los Pinos, C., Soto, A. G., Martín Conty, J. L., & Serrano, R. C. (2020). Summer Camp: Enhancing Empathy through Positive Behavior and Social and Emotional Learning. Journal of Experiential Education, 43(4), 398–415. Dwairy, M. (2010). Parental Acceptance-Rejection: A Fourth Cross-Cultural Research on Parenting and Psychological Adjustment of Children. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 19(1), 30–35. Hart, D., & Carlo, G. (2005). Moral development in adolescence. In J. L. Meece & D. S. Rubin (Eds.), Handbook of Research on Schools, Schooling, and Human Development (pp. 323–344). Routledge. Herrenkohl, T. I. (1998). The effects of child abuse and neglect on cognitive functioning in adulthood. Journal of Family Violence, 13(4), 437–457. Salmela-Aro, K. (2009). Personal goals during the transition to adulthood: A longitudinal study. Journal of Youth and Adolescence, 38(6), 820–833. Brunstein, J. C. (1993). Personal goals and subjective well-being: A longitudinal study. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 65(5), 1061–1070.

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